The Waiting Room

A week before my Poe passed away I had a really interesting dream.

I had died and was suddenly in a place where there were a lot of people standing in several different lines.  The people at the head of each line would tell you where you were to go, Heaven or Hell.

It came to my turn and the man simply told me to go through a certain door.  I started to ask where I was going but he was already talking with the person behind me.  So I walked toward the door, and as I walked I watched as people each went through their own assigned doors.  All the while I remember thinking, "where am I going, and where do their doors lead to?"

I finally arrived at my door as another person entered ahead of me.  I remember feeling relieved that I wouldn't have to go alone, but the person was going so quickly I soon lost sight of him.  Through the door was a long hallway that I traveled through.  It was lit only dimly, just enough to walk through safely.  After I was down the hallway a bit another person entered through the door, but we were spaced at such a distance from each other that we couldn't speak to each other.

Eventually there was another door at the end of this long hallway.  I went through and entered a beautiful white room.  It was so white that it seemed to glow.  It was set up similar to a family room with cozy white couches and chairs, and pictures of families on the white walls.  Everything was white.  There was an older couple in the room, dressed in white, who were gathering the people together and explaining that as soon as we were all there we would move on.

The person who was behind me in the hallway slipped through the door and the older couple told us all where we would be going.  We would be going to Heaven.  And they described a little of what to expect there.

Soon the doors on the other end of the room opened.  They emitted a bright, white light.  Much brighter and whiter than the room we were in and nothing like I had seen before.  Everyone went through.  But I stayed.  I just couldn't go.  I quietly sat down on a couch that faced the door I'd come through.  After a moment the older woman came up to me and told me that I could go to Heaven now, it was time.  I said, "Please let me stay.  I would like to wait here until my husband comes so we can go together."

She responded that I could wait as long as it took.  She told me that the room I was in was called the waiting room and the pictures on the walls were of families who had waited for each other in the room.

And so, I waited.  Many people came through the door and each time some one entered I always hoped it was Allan, but I was always disappointed.  Two groups gathered in the waiting room and went on to Heaven as I waited, but I couldn't go on without him.  It really wouldn't be Heaven if he wasn't there with me.  We have always shared everything and I needed to share this with him too.

Finally, when I was alone in the waiting room (besides the older couple, they were always there), the door opened and Allan stepped through.  I was so, so happy to see him.  We ran to each other, greeting with hugs and kisses like we always do.  I explained to Allan how I couldn't go on without him and that I'd been waiting there for quite a while.  After a few moments the older couple came to us and told us it was time to go. 

We stepped through the doors to Heaven hand in hand and explored the place together, meeting family and friends who had gone on before us.

I woke up shortly after.

At my Poe's funeral, a week later, my Aunt T said something about how she hoped Poe was waiting for her and they could go on together.  I think he is, Aunt T.  I think he is.

A Mover and a Shaker

Little A is getting so big!  She went through another growth spurt this week.  I woke a couple days ago to get her up for the day, and suddenly she looked like she was an inch or two longer and definitely weighed more, lol!  My arms are getting a good workout.

Outfit from Allan and I

Last week after I got A ready for the day she started fussing a little, and I knew she was ready to take a nap.  I wanted to put my contacts in so I could see better to read to her (we usually read while she settles down for a nap).  I put her in her crib propped up on a pillow so she could wiggle around for a minute while I got my contacts in.  When I went to get her I found her sound asleep!  What a good baby!

The last few weeks have been really fun.  A learned how to shake her rattle!  She loves to sit in her Bumbo and shake her rattle or have me shake it for her.

She still loves to play on her play gym, but only if Allan or I are there with her shaking the rattle or singing to the music we have playing.

She loves to mimic and will watch Allan and I closely and mimic our faces.  I was reading the news the other day and made a disgusted face, and when I looked up to check on little A she was staring at me intently with the same disgusted look on her face!  She loves to laugh and will always exchange laughter with us.  It's fun to see how many different ways we can laugh and hear her responses to them.

Outfit from my good friend and neighbor

One day I got bored of our normal routine and put on some music and started dancing for little A.  She LOVED it!  She laughed and laughed at all my silly moves.  We do that often now, and she's started to dance with me, moving her arms and legs to the music.

Outfit from some good friends in AZ

A couple weeks ago we had a visit from two of the children in my Primary class.  They came with their Grandma to give little A a gift and to pick up their bubble wrap because they weren't able to come on Sunday.  We had a really fun visit and A adored them.  She smiled and giggled for them while they made faces and growled at her.  The boys played Connect Four while their Grandma and I visited.  It made for a fun and refreshing afternoon.

Outfit from her birth mom

Last week we had Stake Conference.  At the end of the conference the little boy sitting behind us tapped me on the shoulder and said: "I like that baby you have."  I said thank you and smiled at him.  Then he went on to say "I also like your ear rings.  And I like your eyes.  I also like your hair.  I also like your teeth...."  He had a couple more things to say he liked that I can't remember and then his dad interrupted him.  I responded to everything with a thank you and he must have felt encouraged because he seemed like he could have kept going for a while, lol!  The boy certainly has a gift for flattery!

Little A has always loved to rub my hair on her face.  This last week she decided she wanted to taste it.  I'd actually been able to do my hair that day and it was still a little damp from the gel and spritz.  She grabbed a handful, licked it, and got a mouthful of the gel and spritz!  She wasn't very impressed.  She gave me this look of horror and disgust and hasn't put my hair near her face since!

Allan did some more work on A's nursery.  We're almost done.  We just have to finish painting the stripes and then hang a chair rail.  After that we can decorate!

Little A wants to sit up ALL THE TIME.  She's getting some really strong tummy muscles.  When we lay her down she immediately curls up and gets her head and shoulders off the floor.  She'll stay that way struggling to sit up until we help her.  She loves to sit and just look around.  When she's tired she wants to sit up and will struggle and struggle against sleep until we sit her up, after which she falls asleep within a minute, lol!  The other day Allan was trying to get her to sleep and was holding her in a reclining position.  She kept trying and trying to sit up and was yelling at him.  He finally sat her up and put her pacifier in her mouth and she went right to sleep, almost instantly!  Today at church he sat her in her car seat for a while and she kept struggling to sit up, so he put his foot on the edge of the car seat to hold it more steeply so she was sitting more upright.

Outfit from a good friend who I served a mission with

A also loves to play with her clothes.  If she is wearing a skirt/dress or tutu she'll play with it all day and gets the biggest kick out of it!

She is still such a good sleeper and sleeps between 7 and 10 hours a night.  Her normal night is 9 hours but every now and then she sleeps less.

The Sleep Sheep

Our sister-in-law C and her family gave little a "The Sleep Sheep" for her baby shower.  We LOVE it!  It plays a heartbeat, rain, whales, and the ocean.  It's also super cute, and soft and cuddly! 

 The whales and ocean are sort of deep sounding so she doesn't really like those but she loves the heartbeat and the rain. 

After we brought A home I started using it during her naps.  I found that if I turned that on then the noises I made working around the house didn't startle her and she'd sleep longer.  I've only used it at night once.  She's always been a good night sleeper.

It's made a great difference in helping her to sleep. Thanks C and family!  We love you!

3 Month Pictures

Little A is 3 months old!  

 

The outfit is from some good friends here in AZ and the bow is from the sweet girl who follows our blog.

Sandifer"s Syndrome

When A was about 9 weeks old Allan was changing her diaper.  I was in the living room working on something and suddenly I heard what sounded like her gasping for air and then a loud and long scream followed by crying.  Allan said she was fine and was comforting her, and when he came out he said she just looked like she got really scared and went really stiff.  He thought he just moved too fast, and it scared her.

A few days later it happened again while she was laying on the couch next to him.  I was in the kitchen getting dinner ready and still didn't see it.  We still thought she just got scared for some reason.

Then the next week A was playing on her play gym (she'd been playing for about 30 min.) and I was reading scriptures when it happened again.  I heard what sounded like her starting to gulp for air and looked over.  She was stiff as a board, bright red in the face, her eyes were HUGE, she looked terrified, and she was shaking back and forth.  It looked like she was having a seizure.

I picked her up, and she then let out the long scream and cried for a long time.  When I'd gotten her calmed down she went to sleep.  I took the opportunity to call the nurse line that Allan's work provides.  The nurse was really good and told me that since she was fine afterward it was probably okay, but if she did it again take her to an insta-care or an ER and have her looked at.  As she was telling me this A woke up from her nap and it happened again.

I called Allan and he came home from work so we could go to the doctor.  Thankfully our pediatrician accepts walk-ins, and we were able to see him that day.  We got in really quickly too.  During the appointment it happened every time we laid her down!  It was so scary, and she was so upset.  The doctor knew what it was though and reassured us a lot.

It's called Sandifer's Syndrome.  They don't really know what causes it, but they think it is the baby's reaction to pain from reflux.  It is also sometimes called silent reflux because the baby won't necessarily have a lot of spit up (A rarely spits up).  It is often mistaken for seizures.  There aren't any serious problems that stem from it, and they almost always grow out of it by the time they're 3 years old.  If it's really bad then the baby takes medicine for reflux.  Other than that it just looks really scary and is painful for the baby.

Thankfully A doesn't have it very bad, and we decided not to use the medicine.  It usually happens once a week and seems to be associated with her poop cycle.  If she's a little backed up and has to push harder she'll have an episode.

The days she has it she won't let us put her down, and we have to change her diaper and clothes while she's sitting up.  She's come to really love her bouncer.  We switched her formula to a thicker formula that is heavier, and that has seemed to help (and she's pooping once a day now too!).  We also make sure we hold her up for 30 min. after she eats, and that has seemed to help a lot too.  We're hoping she'll grow out of it quickly.

3 Month Highlights

 Little A is 3 months old!  It's hard to believe it's been 3 months.  It seems like just yesterday, and at the same time it seems like she's always been here with us.  She just gets cuter and cuter every day!

A learned how to click her tongue.  It's super cute, and she usually does it when she's hungry, which is a lot nicer than crying. ;)

She decided for a couple of weeks that she didn't want to suck on her pacifier.  Instead she decided to lick it like a lollipop!  I had to hold it up in front of her mouth and she would stick her tongue out for a lick every now and then, lol!   She also likes to lick her plush, stuffed Giraffe.  What a funny girl.

This sweater and hat were crocheted by my Grandma.

A loves to be outside and we go out as much as possible.  We like to sit outside while she eats and read stories.  We read "Peter Pan" and "Peter Pan in Kensington Gardens" and now we're reading "A Little Princess"

This outfit is pieced together from things from Aunt D and Aunt K6.  The little booties rattle and she loves to kick her feet when she's wearing them.

She got her arm through the rings on her elephant, lol!

I threw a baby shower for a friend.  Thanks to two of our other friends, S and W, it turned out great!  We had a fun afternoon chatting together, and she was given some very cute things!

Daddy likes to give A her bath on Saturday nights.  She LOVES bath time, especially having her hair washed.  We started adding conditioner to her hair because it moisturizes her scalp a little more and seems to have helped the cradle cap go away, so she gets an extra head rub.  We love bath time because she always sleeps extra long during the night!

Daddy brushing A's hair after a bath.

 A loves to snuggle, but until recently she hasn't liked snuggling on the shoulder.  Now she loves it and will often fall asleep this way.

We had a fun Easter, but we forgot to do the Easter bunny thing until the following week!  We had the baby shower the Saturday before Easter, and by the time we'd finished cleaning up after it we'd forgotten all about the Easter bunny.  But, the following week we had a fun time coloring eggs.

A helped until she got too tired. And we finished up without her.

 When we finally gave her the Easter basket she was pretty tired and very grumpy.

 She still helped Dad find the Easter eggs and went to sleep right after. 

 The Easter bunny brought her two Easter books.  One about the Easter bunny and one about Christ.  We've read them several times and she loves them.  The one about the Easter bunny is a lift-the-flap book and she really enjoys that one.  She also got a teething ring and a duck wash cloth.

As per tradition we hid eggs for each other to find.

This is my favorite place Allan hid an egg.

 

Little A loves to lie with her body hanging sideways over the upper arm.  It makes her feel really heavy but it's her favorite way to fall asleep lately.

Little A hates deep voices.  When Allan's voice is really deep in the morning he has to try and make it a little higher so she doesn't squawk.  On Easter Sunday we went to our old ward for a friend's baby blessing.  We really enjoyed seeing everyone, and it gave people a chance to see A.  The last meeting was combined in the chapel.  A was sitting so nicely just looking around and settling down to sleep.  The brother who spoke last got up and said one word, only one, but his voice is very deep and with that one word A had to show her displeasure.  She let out a little drawn out squeak that made all the women surrounding her giggle!  Then she frowned and scowled at that poor brother the rest of the meeting, lol!

A cute outfit from K6 and cousin P

A is now big enough to ride front in the moby wrap and she LOVES it.  She can see so much more this way!  She especially loves it if she's wearing her rattle booties and can shake her feet.

Another fun outfit.

 When A is tired she rubs her eyes, it is so darling.  When she's feeling really tired but doesn't want to go to sleep she yells.  It's not crying, it's yelling...in your ear...for at least 5 minutes!  It's so loud that it echos in our house, and by the time she's done I can't hear anything out of my ear for a while.  When she's like this she won't take a pacifier and nothing consoles her.  I think she just has too much energy to go to sleep, but she's too tired to do anything but yell about it, lol!  I have a really soft voice, and she is already louder than I am.  This could be bad when she gets older...

 She loves to fall asleep while reading stories or playing on her play gym.

We really enjoyed General Conference.  We always love to cuddle during conference, and this time we had a nice long family snuggle.  I loved Elder Bednar's talk about the law of Chastity.  A favorite quote from his talk is "Love increases through righteous restraint".  Amen.  I think our world would be a much better place if we all practiced this principle a little more.

I also loved Sister Dalton's talk about the importance of the mother-daughter relationship.  I hope I can implement some of the things she said so that my relationship with Little A is strong.

This is what she wore during General Conference.  It is another dress from when my sisters and I were babies.

Relaxing with Daddy after conference.

 A has grown out of all of her newborn clothes, but she is still too skinny to really fill out her 0-3 month clothes.  The pants she has now are all the right length, but they're huge around the waist.  If I don't get them pulled up just right they'll fall right off of her when I stand her up!  We call them her "fat pants", lol!

She sat in her bumbo for the first time!  What a big girl!

Dancing with Daddy.  She LOVES to do this!  It melts my heart every time.  A LOVES big band and classical music.  

My primary class is going well.  The last lesson we had was about the baptism covenant.  We talked about how a covenant is a two way promise with God.  To illustrate what a two way promise means I brought bubble wrap.  If you want to see a happy 5 year old give them bubble wrap, and you'll be they're hero!   The deal was that I would let them pop the bubble wrap if they listened to the message written on the back of the bubble wrap.  They loved it and were all successful at keeping their promises!  We also showed how we could keep promises by walking in the hall reverently.  They each got to take a turn getting crayons, returning the class roll, returning the crayons, etc. and the rest of the class would watch them walk down the hall and back as reverently as they could.  It was so cute to see how excited they all were to show me how they could keep their promises.  They even made it through closing exercises without popping their bubble wrap!

Such a happy baby girl!

That same Sunday Allan taught the Teachers Quorum (14 year old boys).  She managed to eat, spit up, and need a diaper change all during his lesson.  Those boys just didn't know what they were in for, lol.

Snuggling her bear.

Love this outfit from K6 and cousin P.

Cute outfit from our friend H.  Allan chose this outfit for her to wear on my birthday.

 I turned 30 (gasp)!  I guess I am 29 and holding so I've held for the first year.  It's all good though because most people think I'm between 22 and 24, lol.  Hopefully I can hold onto that for a few more years. ;)

We had fondu for my birthday dinner.

A managed to have the first blowout in a month on my birthday.  Allan was in the middle of dinner so I had to change her.  She also spit up on me and decided she wanted to be held pretty much all day.  That was okay though because I got a nice long snuggle.

The night before we went to dinner, and then the day of Allan pampered me by doing all the cooking and going on a nice long family walk.

He got me a sewing machine (which I knew about) and surprised me by getting me a serger too!  I'm so excited to get sewing and am currently reading the manual for the sewing machine.  First thing on my list is to take in A's fat pants!  Then I'm going to make some curtains!

I decided on an ice cream cake from DQ this time.  Allan ordered it and they asked if he wanted something written it and in what color.  He told them to write "Happy Birthday"  in pink.  When he went to pick it up the girl walked out with the cake and said "Sorry, we ran out of pink" and then walked away.  No offer of a discount or anything.  So, it was kind of funny looking, but it still tasted good!  We had some friends over the next day to help us finish it.

Love this picture of them!

Such a beautiful smile!

Hahahahahahahahaha! I caught her right before she sneezed!

I made A a story book about how she came to us.  It turned out really cute.  I made it a fairy tale because I love fairy tales and also made it mostly black and white. She loves to look at it, and we read it almost every day.

A sleeps between 7-9 hours at night which makes for a very happy mommy and daddy.  She's the most fun in the mornings because she has a ton of energy from sleeping so long.

She is a very happy baby and loves to laugh and play.

She doesn't have a doctor appointment until she is 4 months old so we don't know how much she weighs or how long she is but I'm guessing around 10 lbs and, based on how her clothes fit, she's probably grown at least another 1/4 inch.  Based on how she's growing she's going to grow out of her 0-3 length wise before they ever fit her width wise!

3 month pictures to come.